Made Bun Bo Hue last night for the first time. SUCCESS. Made enough to feed a family #bunbohue #vietfood #bf
TGIF #earlytorise #workedout #worklyfe #tgif
I had put away a bit of money a few years back in hopes that one day someone would be down to take a spontaneous trip with me somewhere. Maybe we would wake up one morning and say “hey lets go to New Orleans this afternoon”, and then a few hours later we would be there. And we would be a bit unprepared but that’d be just part of the fun. We would get lost but we would just be broadening our horizon. I’m a bit down because I’m using this money for my ticket to Cabo. I know… #firstworldproblems right? But I just wanted to wake up one day in my bed thinking I’m going to be going about my day normally but then all of a sudden I’m listening to live jazz at some old bar half way across the country with a friend, or my boyfriend, or my bestfriend, or just someone down as hell to just let loose and hop on a plane with me with an hours notice! But I come to realize that I’m not that priveledge yet and I don’t know those sort of people yet or they’re not able to yet or I’m just not in the right place at the moment yet. I’ll be spending this money on Cabo… but I guess I havent given up hope that one day I’ll be able to be at home one moment getting ready for work and the next on a plane going to Chicago, so I’ll put money into a piggy bank and hopefully by the time I run into someone whose down to play hookie I’ll have saved up enough to end up somewhere exotic.
I’m not sure why but something today led me to look up my old tutor from when I was a young elementary kid till the time I left for California. She was much more than a tutor to me, she was pretty much family, I saw her everyday and I enjoyed a lot of holidays with her. She took me to get my first library card, check out my first library book, taught me to love books, taught me in every subject school related and even non school related. I was a kid but I knew I loved her a lot, I knew her family and grandchildren and she was close to my whole family. She always had these awesome pens that she would bring and I think because of her I have an enormous liking for pens and books. She would show me pictures of herself from when she was younger and much skinnier as she had gotten much bigger and was always the big lovable tutor of mine and she would talk about how she is trying really hard to get back to her former self. I remember when she had went from a really old gas guzzling car to a brand shiny new red 2 door sports car that she bought from her savings. She’d take me around in both vehicles and I’d have so much fun. I remember when I was going through rebellious stages and I was rude and just didn’t care and when she had had enough of it she slammed her hand on the table and yelled at me and I got so shocked I sat up straight and behaved. I remember this most vividly, it taught me how rude I was being and to never be like that again, but I guess I remember it so well because I regret that I acted that way to someone that I loved so much. To this day, I look back and I cringe at that moment because I want to say that I’m sorry for not giving you the respect you deserved. When I was 11 my parents decided to move to California and I remember the day I had to say bye to her, I cried so much and she cried so much, and now as I’m writing this I can’t help but cry some more. I don’t remember what words or promises were said but I’m sure we had hoped to write to each other since back then Email was a new thing. I think my parents told me to write her the first year or two that I was in California but I never knew what to say, I was shy, so I never wrote her at all, never spoke to her again and never saw her again. I think I looked her up once but I don’t think I ever thought to again until today… I saw her picture pop up on one of the google searches and I clicked on it, then I saw that the description said “Barbara Jo-Ann Rosa : Obituary…” My heart dropped. I’m currently at work with people coming up to me constantly so I wasn’t able to investigate right away but I found out that she had passed away 2 years ago… I’m so incredibly sad and regretful that I never spoke to her again before she passed. She wasn’t just a “tutor”, she was my Teacher and I regret not being able to tell her how much of an impact she made on my life, to update her with my life, to ask about hers and her health, to tell her thank you thank thank you and to tell her I love her. This just brings to perspective on how the years are passing by, we are not only getting older but our elders are too and the more time that passes by the less time they have with us. Barbara was my dad’s age and that just scares me about how old my parents are getting. This also reminds me that the letter that I’ve been meaning to write to my High School English teacher Mr. Holt needs to really be written and mailed to him so I don’t feel this regret again of not being able to say thank you. For a teacher, the impact they have on a student and the lessons they instill are the most rewarding isn’t it? I wouldn’t want to cheat Mr. Holt out of the rewards I cheated from Barbara. My grief is 2 years overdue and my thank you is many many more years overdue and 2 years too late to give. I hope you passed peacefully, surrounded by loved ones… RIP. http://obits.dignitymemorial.com/dignity-memorial/obituary.aspx?n=Barbara-Rosa&lc=4873&pid=157947860&mid=5129077